I'm just a POG

For the most part I’ve enjoyed my stint with the Infantry Marines, or Grunts as they affectionately are termed. However, that is not to say that I don’t have my moments where I just want to go SWO and blow my lid. Believe it or not I have learned to become fairly docile or even neutral the majority of time. I think this Blog proves my rather nonsensical and light hearted commentary. In fact, several people routinely comment on my usual jovial disposition. I am usually the first to crack off some wise ass comment. At any rate, today I find myself fairly irate. The Grunts have a complex about being superior, so much so that they even make pilots seem normal. That is a pretty big statement. Grunts call everyone else POGs (people other than grunts) or Fobbits (people who don’t leave the “wire”). The Marine culture is such that everyone is designed to support the Infantry.

The Infantry is generally spoiled and routinely allowed to sit back and say not my problem and make the support do everything for them. For the record, yes, I am the part of the support. Being the support is annoying. I would much rather be the man; hence, why being a SWO is a good thing. A LT on a ship runs the joint. A POG 0-3 in an Infantry Battalion might as well take out the trash. As you can imagine this is just generally annoying. It gets to the point where if you stand up to a Grunt and tell them “tough break – it is your problem, fix it” they routinely cry like little kids. Today was just such an occasion. I actually got told by some knucklehead that b/c I was a POG – I don’t know what it is like to put my life on the line and that I needed to do more for him. Are you kidding me? Give me a break. Talk about 7th grade drama

Fast forward to actual issue at hand … it was too difficult for this individual to, no kidding, hit the play button on a public address system. I know that I am my fathers son and prone to exaggeration; however, I can assure you that this was really the discourse of events. I didn’t hit play and don’t ever intend on doing so.

With that said, on to more important matters. Happy Father’s Day! And in my best Bon Jovi yelp - Have a Nice Day! Colleen sent that song to me on my IPod … its rather catchy.

Issues

As if I needed to confirm it - but I am ridiculous. I meant to go to bed hours ago - but here I am up "watching" the Padres vs. Cubs over the Internet. OK, I am not really watching. I am hitting the refresh button on my computer every thirty seconds. With Internet access in Iraq being so limited - all streaming media is administratively blocked. I was checking my email before I went down for the night and of course, I checked on my Padres. Low and behold they are/were playing a day game. Naturally, I had to check the score. I opened up my Internet browser to see CY and Zambrano engaged in the typical low scoring affair. No hits through four. Then I read that CY and D. Lee got into a brawl - my interest was peaked. After the dust settled and I frantically search to find out what happened I checked back to see Zambrano still had a no-hitter through 7. So could I go to bed ... of course not. Now I am hitting refresh like every 10 seconds. So now we fast forward to the 9th and good old Russel Branyan goes deep. Amen Friars. THoff comes in and saves his 19th of the year. I can now go to bed content.

This was truly the highlight of my day. If I could go on a limb - I'd say that it was a good old fashioned lazy Saturday. Now if only Colleen was here!

Sadly, I found out that all fantasy sport leagues - read football - are also blocked? Duane any ideas? I nominate Colleen to be my General Manager. Colleen, you up to the Cha-lange? We'll do it Sudoku style! Duane is going down!

Pictures ...

Hello everyone. Not much to report on today. I spent the majority of the day typing away on the various reports that I had to do for the week. Procrastination is a wonderful thing. I wrote a small novel detailing my various assignments and providing the ever-needed status of things. I love how the proverbial boss always needs the latest assessment - no matter what it is that we are doing.


At any rate, I have included some pictures from earlier this week. I am sure that it will take a while to download via your computer - so please stay patient. It took a fortnight just for me to upload them. They are too large to email given my current settings.

The first picture is of me listening, very closely, to something and
the second is me doing my best to stay awake. Look at that form -
who doesn't love it. Yes, I am wearing a flight suit - and it is painful to admit. However, we wear them b/c they are flame resistant and with IEDs all over the place one of the biggest concerns is that your HUMVEE gets smoked and you are caught in the vehicle. When it comes to staying safe - I am all for it. Even if it means that I have to go over to the pilot side of the house. So there ... whoever said that pilots don't contribute is somewhat wrong!

Enjoying the Porta Johns - Once Again

Obviously, I've been away from my computer for a while. http://www.usmc.mil/ has a story about some of things that my battalion has been doing. Story ID# is 20076124159. I'm told it is the easiest way to search for it. If that doesn't work try Second Battalion 6th Marines.

I'm not exactly sure what the Arabic word alljah means - I'm told it depends on how you say it. Your guess is as good as mine. What is interesting is that if you were to take the the f u out of Fallujah you have alljah. Ironic? So I guess you could say that 2/6 is taking the f u out of Fallujah. Nice, very nice. At any rate, it is a very exciting time, as the citizens of Fallujah are leading the way and are truly responsible for their own security. The people have embraced this concept and doing great things.

And whomever said that sleeping on concrete was fun better go see the doctor. Can I get a chiropractor? I can see my book title now - A yearlong camping trip to Iraq. Sleeping on the floor of abandoned buildings also illustrates just how wonderful plumbing really is. Duane, I haven't talked about plumbing in a while - so this one is for you. Heck after a few days of using "wag bags" I was pleased to return to the stack of porta johns. Listen, all you have to do is lower your expectations ...

Jake Peavy was dominant last night - enough said.

Meg - Thanks for the try w/ Monsters. Go ahead and try them - you'll get all kinds of fired up. Don't worry about it - who knows when the mail arrives. I don' think it would been very fun for the cargo handlers to have to deal with exploded drinks all over the place.

Mr. Herky Jerky is Mr. Bill of Abita Springs. Sorry dad, you can't take credit for that one.

Mr. Smooth Swing - identify yourself

Byron - you may be quite the accomplished futballer; however, the remainder of your athletic prowess still remains on the t-ball fields of Virginia.

Duane - Thanks for the Pro Football Magazine subscription. I think that a Fantasy Football Challenge is being issued right now. Can you handle it?

Padres Leadership - where are my job offers?

Finally, a big Bravo Zulu Mom, glad to see that you are now off and racing in this parallel Internet reality. Looking forward to your comments.

Mail!

To be quite clear - an Eagle, Globe, and Anchor tattoo is not in my future. I'll expand that statement even further - no tattoo of any sort will grace my skin. For a long time now, one of my worst fears in life would be that after a heavy night of tomfoolery, I would wake up with a throbbing pain in my shoulder and look down to see some sort of permanent ink picture affixed to my body. I surmise that one of my Sailors would have convinced me that it was a great idea and I guess in my deteriorated state I agreed. I've managed to stave off that event - even after visiting several third world nations, including Mexico. I plan to keep it that way. Tattoo's are a personal choice and I have no problem with them - it is just not my choice.

Today mail arrived for the first time in almost two weeks. Not real sure what the hold up was - but at any rate, I still give the USPS a thumbs up for keeping the mail wait time down. After all, it isn't like Iraq has a real large infrastructure nor can it control a mail convoy once it arrives. Much to my chagrin, I was once again the envy of the battalion. I had 4 packages waiting for me. Unlike the viewers of the Soprano's finale, or so I've read, I was not left staring into the black hole of imaginary boxes. Thanks for the offer, TJ, but I have to respectfully decline. I'd just rather wait until it comes out on DVD and watch the whole season. However, if you can offer up some baked ziti and red wine - I'll acquiesce.

First, the Long Beach Moody's provided some DVDs and much need drink mix packages. Meg came off the top rope and provided 6 movies, all of which I haven't seen. Not too bad for someone who likes watching tennis on the television. Natchez, MS weighed in with plenty of beef jerky and drink mixes - you'll see a great pattern develop with the drink mixes and jerky. Even Mr. Herky Jerky Golf Swing himself, of Abita Springs came off the golf course with some beef jerky and some CDs! Lastly, Colleen (in her usual form) delivered with a nice sundry mix of items. As sad as it may seem, the best item from her package, was a pair of headphones. Now I can actually listen to music from my IPod in both ears! And yes, she included a plethora of beef jerky and sugar free drink mixes! Thank you all very much. I really appreciate it and I want ya'll to know that getting mail makes my day. It is just something about getting mail that is exciting. I never understood why my Dad was/is habitually crazy about the mail - almost to the point of stalking, asking "Did the mail come? Um, that's interesting, it usually here by now ... I wonder what's wrong?" I can now say that after five deployments - I get it. I guess it all centers around the point that mail is exciting b/c it represents home and hopefully, something new that just isn't available. I sense that I am rambling.

The beef jerky was much needed. We have some things going on and collateral is always a good thing. Now, all I need to complete my quest for domination in Iraq is a case of Monster! Don't take that as a request to send a case - seriously, that isn't needed and it would cost way too much of the American greenback.

Two of my fellow EWOs - who are taking year long vacations in Baghdad - are trying to expand my horizon and get me to read and appreciate poetry. The first part I have succeeded at - I can read. The second endeavor is a much more difficult task. With some hint of excitement, I have come to the following conclusion: I don't get poetry, don't want to, and just don't care. I'm sure that comes as a big shock. I'd much rather argue my status as a Padre fanatic and lament in what has become the constant one run game, which has to be decided in the 9th inning. Now if I can only figure out a way to parlay that into a six figure job with the Padres! John Mooers, Sandy Alderson, Kevin Towers - if your out there and want to offer me a job - yes, I'll beg ... SIGN ME UP!!!

Pimped Out

This blog takes on a new life of its own as time goes by ... What was once an informational dialogue has now shifted gears and become a place to advertise for "other" projects. So in my best Big Lebowski moment I'll have to say that, "This aggression will not stand."

Damn Padres - not much more that I can say about them. They go from the best record in the NL to loosing the the Marines in back to back 6-5 games. So when is Towers going to trade for another bat?

Not a whole lot happened today. I am pretty pleased with my lack of achievement. You stay classy San Diego ...

Comments are good

I must admit that the best part of this blog is the comments that are left in response to my inane thoughts. Most I understand - and some I don't. In no particular order I'd like to address some of the ones from yesterday:

Duane - You must be sniffing too much of little Kenny's bio hazard. What in the heck is your comment "Which hemisphere" referring to? Thanks SHIPMATE! And do you really want me to start on you about your athletic prowess ... I mean you were the original triple threat! Enough said. I'll start by commenting about your football abilities. Sorry pal - the Steelers made a wise decision not to draft you after your self proclaimed terrific 2/c year of flag football at USNA. I heard that Coach Cower came to personally scout you - however, after about the 4th time that Tony beat you deep - he packed it up and went to Ohio to scout Big Ben. If you look closely at the draft reports it did come down to you or Rothelisberger (I can't spell). Sorry to say, it looks that the Terrible Towel Franchise made the right call. At least you're a Naval hero now destined to be a CO. We are so lucky to know that you'll be out and about in the littoral for years to come.
What's your retort? I sat the bench on the baseball team? You'll have to do better than that. And to leave on a good note - yes, you can beat me with your eyes closed in all bar sports.

Uncle KC - I don't have nice things to say to you - I'm flat out jealous. I think the reason that I am now skinnier than Duane's fat ass is the lack of beer. It is just not fair. However, I am glad to learn that my cousins are all doing well. Spain and Grad School? How am I supposed to compete with that?

Meg - C'mon Tennis? Really? I mean even the CAVS vs SPURS NBA Championship Game One had higher television ratings! The Neilson Ratings for the game last night was at an all time low and still beat out the Women's Tennis final by several percentage points. Heck, Hippie Skippie the cartoon draws better on Saturday mornings. I will concede that the Men's Final will have better numbers - but that doesn't make me a sexist - nor does it make it right. Maybe the drama of Roger winning the missing link on his majors quest will help. I doubt it though.

Dad - You'd think that since you are responsible for my conception that I'd give you a pass. Don't count on it. First, I'd like to be clear that golf has merit, especially if you consider that you have to be in good financial shape to play the game on a routine basis. That notwithstanding, it still is hard to give absolute credit when you play a game that is arguably more fun when you drink beer and/or can play with a lighted cigar.

Next to address your comments about my weight - I wonder what side of the family that I get my frame from - Thanks for that one. Byron and Sean are gigantic and you I ... well? Additionally, I was never larger than 210 and that was after I had arthroscopic knee surgery. I mean it is hard to compare me now to a time after plebe summer where I was a whopping 165. Those times are long gone.

Izzy - Colleen is still faster pushing your kids around in a double stroller than I am with a jet pack strapped to my large arse.

Things are good - thanks for keeping up with my various rants. Until next time ...